Boomer Babble

November is here, which means it’s show time (time for the PLMA’s Private Label Trade Show, that is). Please excuse me while I adjust my hearing aid and locate my cane in preparation to hobble down the expo aisles.

You see, I’m a baby boomer — and apparently just a stone’s throw away from full-blown senior citizen status and its accompanying maladies. At least that’s what the ubiquitous reports on “aging baby boomers” keep telling me.

Many of these reports are advising CPG companies and retailers to invest in product tweaks and merchandising/layout strategies that will better serve boomers in their senior years (which begin in 2011 for the oldest boomers, when they reach the magic age of 65). A recent article in The Wall Street Journal shows that Kimberly-Clark Corp. (in conjunction with a handful of retailers) has taken this advice to heart. In a project that aims to improve the shopping experience for soon-to-be-senior boomers, Kimberly-Clark employees and retail executives have been shopping store shelves from a senior’s perspective. In fact, the article says, these folks actually donned vision-blurring glasses, dropped popcorn kernels into their shoes and even bound their thumbs with tape in an effort to mimic the senior shopping experience.

The best of intentions aside, I have to agree with Joan Treistman, president of the Treistman Group and a Retailwire BrainTrust member, who provided her opinion on the project in a Sept. 21 Retailwire.com discussion.

“Help me understand why the research has to be conducted with senior wannabes instead of people who have the characteristics of seniors — i.e., seniors!” she wrote. “If this large segment of the shopping population is a worthy target, I believe it makes sense to examine their wants and needs directly.”

My thoughts exactly, Joan. Surely the researchers could locate plenty of senior citizens willing to weigh in with useful suggestions.

And that leads me to another beef I have with this project and all the other “aging baby boomer” hoopla. Senior citizens have been around for just about forever. So why are folks focusing on the seniors to come instead of the seniors who are already here? Although the sheer size of the boomer generation ensures an eventual top-heavy population (age-wise, that is), CPG manufacturers and retailers have plenty of opportunities to serve seniors now.

What’s more, I’m betting that many baby boomers are growing a bit weary of all the aging chatter. The fact is, everybody is aging. Moreover, some of us boomers — the tail-enders such as me — won’t attain senior citizen status for almost another 20 years. And even when we do, many more years likely will pass before our bodies are fraught with debilitating ailments and aches and pains.

Furthermore, it’s just plain silly, and even potentially dangerous, to lump such a large group of people — a group with widely varying ages, interests and needs — into one retail target demographic. Condition-specific products and merchandising certainly make sense. But boomer-specific products and merchandising do not.